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Loving-Kindness Meditation

April 9, 2018 Minelli Eustacio

For this month of cannabis-infused yoga classes I decided to offer a focus on chest-openers. Chest-openers can be backbends like upward facing dog or bridge pose, but can also be standing poses like tree or extended side angle. Either way, they're magic for reversing chronic forward hunching (the kind we do over a computer, a steering wheel, and a meal), relieving shoulder tension, and improving rib cage flexibility, allowing our lungs to expand larger and take deeper breaths with more ease as a result. And deeper breathing always means enhanced well-being and health.

Chest-openers are also called heart-openers, because beyond their physical benefits, chest-openers raise confidence and outlook, and help deepen feelings of love and compassion for ourselves and others.

With this in mind, last Friday's yoga practice begun with a short loving-kindness meditation supported by potent, euphoria producing Gorilla Glue #4 (One of my faves. My husband and I have a little baby of our own growing at home and she's looking mighty fine), cbd, topicals, and restorative fish pose. The perfect set-up to feel grounded and receptive for some heart-opening.

Below, you'll find the little loving-kindness practice we did, feel free to light up your favorite body melting flower to compliment the experience. This is a great practice to do in the morning to set the tone of your day, and to cultivate and share compassion, love, and empathy to yourself and others. I hope it serves you as well as it has me.


Find a comfortable position, whatever that looks like for you. You can be seated or even laying down. Feel free to prop yourself up in a passive heart-opening shape like reclined bound angle pose or restorative fish. 

Close your eyes.

Allow your body to relax. Soften your shoulders, release tension from your face and jaw.

Start to notice your breath. How it moves, where you feel it 

Bring your attention to your heart center, noticing your chest rise and fall with the movement of your breath.

Start to visualize your inhales drawing loving-kindness into your heart, filling your chest cavity, then eventually your whole body. See your exhales bring loving-kindness from your whole body into your heart.

Do this for a few rounds of breath.

Now, think of someone you love. 

Visualize your heart space filling with loving-kindness with your inhale, then on your exhale send all of your loving-kindness to this person, thinking the mantra, “I wish you happiness, I wish you ease, I wish you love” as if you were saying it to that person. 

Think of someone your have neutral feelings towards.

Inhale fully, taking loving-kindness up into your lungs. Exhale deeply and send all of your loving-kindness to this person, repeating the mantra, “I wish you happiness, I wish you ease, I wish you love” as if you were speaking to them.

Think of someone who you have less than desirable feelings towards. Focus on them while inhaling loving-kindness into your heart. Send them all of your loving kindness on your exhale, and repeat the same mantra.

Think of yourself. 

Inhale, seeing your body fill with loving-kindness. Repeat the mantra and send all of your loving-kindness to yourself. 

Think of all living beings. Take a long, even inhale of loving-kindness. Repeat the mantra as you release your breath and loving-kindness to all living being everywhere.

Take a few more rounds of breath, staying with these feelings after this practice for a while before doing some intuitive, gentle stretches, going onto your yoga practice, lighting up more herb, or moving into the rest of your day.

xo

Tags meditation, compassion, plant medicine, cannabis
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How to Stay Calm & Grounded When Your High Isn't

April 4, 2018 Minelli Eustacio

Originally posted April 4th 2017

Many of us have a story of consuming cannabis and it hitting a lot harder than we'd anticipated, getting a quick lesson in dosing and discovering our "subjective therapeutic window" which Uwe Blesching describes in The Cannabis Health Index as a personal dosage that is just enough to feel the desired benefits of cannabis, and not an excessive amount that can counteract these effects. You can find your subjective therapeutic window by taking a small hit of a joint, bowl, or other smoking apparatus, waiting for 10 minutes or more to see the effects, then taking the same amount again and wait another 10 minutes if you desire a stronger effect.

Discovering your subjective therapeutic window is important for a comfortable and enjoyable high, but until then you may face frustration with consuming too little, and more likely, have an unpleasant trip from consuming too much THC, so it helps to be prepared with tools to stay calm and grounded even when your high seems to be getting out of hand. Here are a 4 tips and techniques that have helped me prevent and coax down getting too high,

1. Always have CBD products on hand

CBD is the yin to THC's yang. Where THC produces the psychoactive mental high, CBD is the non-psychoactive cannabinoid in cannabis that does not give any mind altering effects and is generally used to treat pain, post traumatic stress disorder, anxiety, and as an anti-inflammatory. CBD is extremely effective in taming the psychoactive influence of THC, allowing consumers to experience THC's therapeutic properties. CBD tinctures are a great tool to de-escalate a high as the dropper makes dosing easy, and sublingual application allows for fast acting relief from an uncomfortable trip.

2. Practice 2:1 breathing

2:1 breathing is a deep, diaphragmatic breath where the exhale lasts twice as long the inhale. This is beneficial because the heart beats slower on an exhale which is generally calming and reduces fear and anxiety - common symptoms for someone who's consumed more than their ideal dose of THC. This breathing practice is used often in yoga and meditation to bring focus to the present moment, give a soft focus to the practitioner's mind, and activate the parasympathetic nervous system, our internal system responsible for rest and digestion which sends signals to the mind and body to relax.

When you've smoked too much cannabis, practicing 2:1 breathing for a few minutes in a seated position can calm your nerves and also give you a focus on your inhales and exhales, drawing your senses to inward rather than to outward sensory stimuli.

3. Be mindful of your thoughts

Once you get caught up in the fact that you're just too high, it's easy to get carried away to a point of panic. Your thoughts and breath have a lot of power in affecting how you feel. If you're in a panic and only repeat thoughts that reinforce this, you're facilitating more thoughts that will make the situation feel even worse. Mindfulness is known to reduce stress and when combined with 2:1 breathing is a great way to activate the parasympathetic system and cultivate calm. While practicing 2:1 breathing be mindful of any thoughts that come up. Notice, is this thought helpful? Is this thought accurate? Do not actively try to change your thoughts, just acknowledge them as they come in, notice what kind of thought it is, don't judge it or yourself, then let the thought go and bring your attention back to your breath. And remind yourself that any negative effects that you're feeling from the bad trip will soon pass.

4. Move with curiosity and non-judgement

Judging yourself when you get too high is an easy place to go to, but switching this action to curiosity creates an opportunity to explore yourself and actively learn from the situation. I recently took an Anusara cannabis yoga workshop (my first time doing a cannabis-enhanced class under someone else's instruction) where I smoked a kief covered joint and scoffed medicated gummie bears - it was heaven. We started the class and after a few poses I noticed my hands were shaking as I pressed them together in samasthiti. I could feel a vibration through my whole body. There were two perspectives I could have taken in this situation; one embraced curiosity and the other a critique. Rather than scold myself for how I shook in the pose, I noticed the energy and excitement the cannabis caused in me, how it effected my practice, how my breath and heartbeat were magnified, how I could be curious and love the way I moved and my capabilities at this moment. This shifted my thoughts out of whether I had smoked more than I should to a state of calm and child-like curiosity, where I was happy to learn and explore my body and mind as if it were new. If you practice yoga, I recommend doing slow rounds of classic sun salutations and pay extra attention to the breath and the way your body feels. Notice without judging. Stand in a strong samasthiti or mountain pose with your feet rooted, legs engaged, and tailbone lengthening to the floor. Be compassionate with yourself, see if you can move with a beginner's curiosity, and stay with yourself until you feel calm and grounded.

Facing Difficult Emotions Head-On With The Aide of Cannabis

March 28, 2018 Minelli Eustacio

Emotions are a normal and vital part of our lives, but we often filter out so-called negative emotions and hang onto the ones that make us feel good. Can cannabis be an emotional ally and shine a light on our habits of attachment to good feelings only, while helping us experience and understand all of our emotions? We love the highs of life and hate the lows, but evading emotions isn't a healthy or productive way to deal with our feelings, so how can we use a connective cannabis high to change our reaction to our lows?

First, we must realize that all emotions are inherently positive. Difficult emotions can be painful at times, especially when we feel them very often or dwell on them. Still, no matter how painful, emotions are supposed to be felt and can be an indicator of underlying issues we may have. Anger, resentment, or frustration may be trying to tell us that we are uncomfortable in a situation or want to protect something, that someone has made us mad and we need to set boundaries for that relationship, or it may be telling us that we've been holding onto a past event that needs to be resolved. Feelings of insecurity might be a reflection of not feeling stable or deep seeded issues of not feeling good enough. Without fear how would you know you were in danger? Emotions are the feedback that teach us something important about a situation or ourselves, we just have to learn to differentiate between negative emotions and our negative reactions to those emotions.

Cannabis heightens our ability to notice our mind fluctuations and sensations, and feel more in and aware of our body. The ripple effect our breath has on our body becomes more profound and every thought is enlightening (because of the way cannabis interacts with our neurotransmitters). Cannabis gives us a space to be conscious of our habits and thought patterns without the stickiness of self-judgment or feeling the need to drown out difficult emotions with mantra or positive affirmations.

Cannabis enables us to step off to the side, outside of our typical perspectives and stories, and be. 

With her aide we can create space, a softness around the emotion being felt, where we can step through the fourth wall and observe our whole selves - seeing where an emotion stems from with less critical, jarring, and sensitive eyes. With more clarity and compassion. Oftentimes this opens our minds to the fact that things we get emotionally riled up over usually aren't as important after a few breaths and further inspection. And if those issues still feel important it's even more pertinent to allow yourself space to express those grievances through your emotions. Emotions have many sides and cannabis helps us see them individually, in turn teaching us to respond to emotion rather than bury it, which can be the fine line between feeling a little frustration, blood boiling anger, or calcified bitterness, all varying degrees of anger.

An important practice for dealing with difficult feelings is to acknowledge them without clinging to or pushing them away. Regularly checking in with our emotions can help us become better attuned to receiving their messages. We can identify the subtle difference of each emotion and hone into exactly what we are feeling without criticism. Knowing what jealousy feels like and the varying degrees in which it shows up in you can help you faster identify it and get to the root of the cause.

Cannabis and her ability to raise our awareness and perception of our emotions can help with this identification of emotions and their nuanced sensations, guiding us into deep self discovery and understanding.

A safe space we can explore using cannabis to face difficult emotions is in our yoga practice. In yoga, most of us have the habit of pushing away difficult emotions when we try a shape like swan or chair pose. We resist the shape because it's new, uncomfortable, or challenging, we self-criticize because we're struggling in the shape and make comparisons. Our thoughts feed into the cycle of negativity and we get out of the pose so that we don't have to feel that emotion anymore. But notice what happens when those shapes become more familiar to us and start to feel good. We surrender to and revel in the blissful shape, our ego inflates because we are able to hold the pose longer than before, we still make comparisons. We cling to positive emotions and push away difficult ones when neither will last forever. Cannabis can shine a light on the emotional signs present throughout our practice and enable us to feel freely while peeling back layers of discomfort and avoidance that allow negative thought patterns and emotions to persist unchecked. We are better able to go through emotions (both positive and negative) without the need to cling to or drown them out with positive affirmations and mantras, evading what the emotions is trying to express. Cannabis can be a way to observe and acknowledge all spectrums of emotion, then gently let it go on when they no longer serve us.

Cannabis promotes mindfulness, our awareness of the present moment, and when we toke with intention it can be a path to home, yourself - your thoughts, feelings, sensations, and emotions, all of you - without need to alter what is there. When we create this space with powerful plant medicine we are able to create space for our emotions to show up without fear of being evaded or judged. Then with continued mindfulness practice (with or without the aide of cannabis) we are more able to sit with those emotions and see whether they stem from love, reality, ego, fear, trauma or another place. We discover and re-learn ourselves through observation and the gentle guidance of cannabis. We learn to experience difficult emotions, and when we hit that wall of peak discomfort we lean into the wall and find softness instead of hardening. Be curious. Notice what bodily sensations arise with certain emotions or how it shows up in your mood state. We cannot fool ourselves into believing the emotion isn't there, so name and observe it, without having to feed into it.

The remnants of pain left behind by every strong negative emotion that is not fully faced, accepted, and then let go of join together to form an energy field that lives in the very cells of your body. - Eckhart Tolle, A New Earth

Ignored emotions will not dissipate so it is in our best interest to allow our feelings to rise up, observe those feelings rather than resist, and listen to what they're trying to tell you. We observe the negative without feeding it. We acknowledge it's existence without having to be completely identified with it. Once we've found out how and why negative emotions are showing up, we must ask ourselves what we can realistically do to remove that thing. It may be something as simple as having a conversation with someone, or more difficult like expanding our perception about a situation, something cannabis can help with.

Use this time of discovery to feel grateful, curious, excitement, love, and content about the process of exploring difficult emotions. This way you're not drowning out a difficult feeling with positive affirmations, but bringing positivity into a realm we typically consider as negative and unnecessary. Working more with difficult emotions means turning them into your allies rather than enemies. These emotions are not meant to be sent away, told they are bad, or repressed.  They are meant to help us see what is going on in our lives and respond with love and clarity.

Tags cannabis, plant medicine, self-exploration, mindfulness
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Setting Intentions for a Deeply Connected High

March 13, 2018 Minelli Eustacio

Do you ever take the time to do nothing but smoke? I mean, roll up a good blunt or joint and smoke it while doing literally nothing else but being present. At the most just enjoying the smoke while chatting with your friend or love, or sitting out on your patio in silence observing traffic as the outdoor climate awakens your skin. Because I'm so used to the act of smoking I tend to smoke while sending emails, while reading textbooks, or scrolling through my phone, and I've noticed dividing my attention like this takes away from the whole high I could be experiencing.

In our society multitasking is considered a positive, but when we spread our attention between several different things it's impossible to experience one thing fully or complete a task to the best of our ability. And when it comes to consuming cannabis, not being fully present for your high bares the questions Why smoke in the first place if you're not mentally there to experience it? Do you consume cannabis to remove yourself from the present moment or to help immerse yourself in it? Are your smoke sessions a passive and disconnected activity with no conscious intention besides getting high in that moment? Whatever the answers may be, it's okay to be aware of them without adding any extra narrative or judgments.

A few days ago I put aside my other tasks to smoke some Gorilla Gold (indica-dominant hybrid) my husband had rolled up for us to share. I set the intention to be present, ignore all distractions, and focus on being in the space at that very moment. We lit the blunt and raised it in dedication to enjoying time together after a full day of work. I noticed how the blunt smelled and tasted, how the cannabis was making me feel, how I was so comfortable being in my home with my husband smoking on our Friday night, all of which were effecting my experience. Being the most present I could created a much stronger connection with my high and gave me greater control of it.

Although I had smoked this same flower before I had never done so with mindfulness and intention setting, so this time I was much more engaged with the experience. The strain's true indica effects gave me a wonderful body-enveloping high as I lifted my limbs as if moving through water - slow and steady with each micro-movement feeling sweet. I moved slowly and consciously to feel these intricate sensations, gave myself a good morning stretch that made my body feel as if it had been contracted for most of the day and was just now opening up. The sofa hugged my body from all sides and sunk me into the cushions, giving me a strange sense of safety and comfort. I was caught in the flow of my body movement and it's sensations, euphoric, out of my thoughts, and still able to engage with my surroundings while enjoying how cannabis was enhancing the experience.

The strain's true indica effects gave me a wonderful body-enveloping high as I lifted my limbs as if moving through water - slow and steady with each micro-movement feeling sweet.

Disconnecting from or finishing other tasks before lighting up acts as a reminder to practice mindfulness while consuming cannabis and deeply engages you to the effects of your high. This awareness helps us maintain a healthy relationship with this powerful herb while bringing enjoyment to being present rather than falling into the stress building mindlessness of multi-tasking. And with all of your attention focused on actually experiencing your high, it is easier to feel the vast variety of effects a strain is having on your body, learn how certain strains show up in you/whether or not they work for you, and learn how you react to the high mentally, emotionally, and physically therefore making it easier to monitor and responsibly dose yourself. This awareness can ultimately make you so deeply connected to the full extent and experience of your high that you smoke less than you normally would do when your attention is preoccupied with other thoughts and tasks.

Outside of setting an intention of presence with your flower, some other ways you can practice mindfulness for a deeply connected high are to be aware of what kind of cannabis you're consuming. Is it an indica, sativa, or hybrid? Knowing the strain greatly influences how much you'll consume and what you'll experience.

Smell the nugs before consuming them - cannabis is a flower after all, and most strains smell delicious and pungent. Notice whether the scent reminds you of fruit, earth, cheese, pine, a memory, or anything else specific. Does it make your mouth water or is it off-putting? How does the smell make you feel?

Disconnecting from or finishing other tasks before lighting up acts as a reminder to practice mindfulness while consuming cannabis and deeply engages you to the effects of your high.

Taste the cannabis or whatever you've chosen to roll it in. Take slow, occasional hits so you can experience the different flavors that come up and gradually escalate your high. For the purest taste I recommend smoking out of a clean bowl and using a hemp wick to light the cannabis, this way there's no taste of butane from the lighter.

Take notes. What's the name of the strain? What shop did you get it from? What time did you smoke? How did you smoke and how much? What did you feeling while smoking? Take notes on this and whatever else comes to mind on a scrap of paper, a notebook, or your phone - just letting it flow and add to the deeper connection and understanding of your high.

Start with setting an intention to be present with your cannabis and these other mindful habits will follow. If you like to smoke in the morning (it's not for everyone, but I find certain strains like Pineapple Express are energizing, focusing, and induce productivity), smoke your first bowl and set an intention to be present with it. I find that doing this in the morning makes mindful choices occur naturally as the day goes on. Put down your phone, listen to a podcast, sit or lay comfortably, sip water, and smoke. Notice how the high creeps up and expresses itself over time. Notice how your body and mind reacts to this, without any extra narratives or judgments, just feel this deep connection with your high. A deeper connection with your high means a deeper connection with yourSelf.

How Cannabis Promotes Mindfulness

March 5, 2018 Minelli Eustacio

If you’ve taken a yoga class you’ve probably heard an instructor talk about mindfulness. They may have set mindfulness as a communal intention for the class, or even read a quote to drive the theme home, but what does mindfulness really mean? To be mindful simply means to be aware; to calmly acknowledge and accept your whole self (thoughts, feelings, your body and it’s sensations) in the present moment.

Practicing mindfulness doesn’t come easily, but we tune in to it often through yoga, pranayama practice (conscious breathing) and seated meditation. Certain strains of cannabis, particularly strong indicas and hybrids, recreate the effects meditation has on the brain as they both promote euphoria, relaxation, pain tolerance, self awareness, empathy, and generally enhance our perception of an experience, while decreasing depression, stress, and anxiety – all of which aid in taking the trip to a mindful state.

The biggest benefit here is that cannabis increases self awareness – the entire idea behind mindfulness. If you’ve ever been in a yoga class unable to tune in and feel your breath, you know how difficult it can be to find the extraordinary in what seems like a very ordinary action. We breathe literally every second of our lives so a disconnection with this process is natural, but with cannabis we’re able to rediscover the magic of our breath, and the simple act of breathing becomes profound. The fact that cannabis also enhances our perception of that experience means that you’ll stay entranced by the ebb and expansion of your lungs and belly for longer, letting go of the external world until the world is just your body and breath.

Of course, practicing mindfulness when consuming cannabis is essential to reaping all of these benefits and preparing your body and mind for bliss. No two strains are created equal so be sure to talk to your budtender about the effects of particular strains so you can make an informed choice. Whether you are new to consuming cannabis or not, smoke less than you normally would as meditating increases the high considerably – you can always have more later if you want to. 

Consuming progressively rather than all at once ensures you won’t get to a point where your mind is running wild, and also encourages listening very closely to your body’s needs. And that, my friends, is where a sweet mindfulness practice begins. This is not to say you should get high every time you want to be mindful (which is ideally all of the time), not only is that unrealistic, it’s an unhealthy relationship with a plant that can be wholly therapeutic. Experiment with consuming cannabis while meditating or doing yoga and notice how you’re able to let go of the external. Hold on to this ease. Feel it in your fibers. The next time you return to your mat for a moment of meditation, you’ll notice returning to bliss is much more accessible, with or without the aid of cannabis.

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Photography credits to PuffPuffPassCo and Murilo Ottoni Costa